Something that is really interesting is how people stare at other people even when they personally believe that staring is rude. Why does this occur? Why are people so fascinated with other people? I like to think of myself as a person that isn’t really concerned too much with strangers and their lives. If I see an unusual couple pairing or an individual wearing interesting clothing, I’d probably just smile to myself and think, “that’s cool”. Of course, not everyone likes change, difference or “abnormality”. I would be a liar if I said I was completely open to these things too.
Even though my fiance and I have been together for almost five years, it still bothers me how we are stared at constantly. Yes I understand that it’s not as common here to see our type of inter-ethnic couple, but I find that most stares are more than just curiosity. Many stares are filled with hatred, mostly from our own “racial” groups – which I really don’t understand. How is our relationship threatening to anyone else?
I find that I am the target of these hateful looks more than my fiance. I attribute this to the believe that women are the gatekeepers of morality. When we see a woman that is too sexual, too independent, too free spirited, and who goes against her expected role, she is seen as being a failure to her role as a moral gatekeeper. She is seen as the slut, the whore, the traitor. Why is this message still reproduced in our society? It is complete bullshit. Why is it the woman’s purity that is supposed to be protected? Why isn’t she allowed to have autonomy over her body and her selection of partners? And why is she given more flack for marrying outside her caste, social class, ‘race”, ethnicity, etc.? Our society still has so much to overcome in terms of gender inequality. Even after teaching three first-year classes of sociology students (they tend to be very naive about the world), it still amazes me how many people think that we have achieved gender equality. Oh ignorance…it is NOT bliss.
